to everything there is a season: turn, turn, turn

Spring and summer are usually my favorite times of the year. The first signs of spring waking from its winter slumber are magical to me. Everything feels fresh and new. Possibilities seems endless and hopes and dreams bubble up in my heart. The first day when it's finally warm enough to break out the Rainbows, planning trips to new places, and mild days of weather perfection make me feel all is right and good in the world. So many fun and exciting seasons of my life have started right around spring time like my now husband asking me on our first date, getting engaged (just before spring), and finding out I was pregnant.

I barely remember what spring felt like this year. It came and went without me noticing. Earlier this year I was given counsel to just hang on until the summer. There were difficult situations and decisions that needed to be made, and I was feeling the pressure of having to sort it all out right then. The summer would bring reprieve and a welcomed change in routine as it always does. My husband would be home, and we could take a breath.

He went back to work three weeks ago and right before his first day I said, "You know we spent the first half of the year just waiting for this season and now it's over." A sense of hopelessness came with the start of a new school year. It felt like we were diving head first back into where we left off before summer, and it didn't feel good.

But then something amazing happened.  Everything didn't turn black, blue and gray. Things went rather smoothly and our feelings of hopelessness and desperation turned to, "Everything's going to be OK." I don't exactly have a tangible reason for this hope that is floating to the top, but I do know when I've experienced this in the past something good is on the way. Maybe not in time for fall or winter or even spring, but it's coming.

This fall feels kind of like New Years to me. A chance to reevaluate and reset. A chance for change and growth. A chance for tearing down and rebuilding. Cheers to new seasons that offer hope and even if the change I long for doesn't come quickly may my heart still sing praise and my eyes stay fixed on Him.